Friday, January 16, 2015

It is hard

I wrote the following last year

"My little one was born early. 
My little one was in the NICU. 
My little one had to be transferred to a different hospital. 
My little one came home with medical equipment. 
My little one needed help breathing and eating. 
My little one needed medical equipment until he was 17 days old.
My little one was hoovering too close to being too small for my comfort.
My little one is too small for Newborn clothing and diapers
My little man is a miracle!
He has survived so much, in his short time outside of me. 
He began breathing with out any help,
his liver began to function like it should,
he opened his eyes. 
He is now being alert,
able to eat with minimal help, 
the best thing of all...
able to hold my finger with his little hands. 

He is strong. 
Really strong. 
He is sweet, 

Today, I write about our challenges. My little one has come so far in year it is amazing. So, peanut this is for you. 

I spent the first year of your life watching.
w\Watching you breathe,
watching your chest move up and down
watching your weight gain,
I spent the first year of you life waiting.
Waiting to see if your little body needed a surgery, 
waiting to hear that your weight gain was good
I spent the first year of your life praying. 
Praying for your health,
 praying for me,
 praying for you dad,
praying for strength. 

We had so many ups and downs.
 You rolling over,
your problem with an internal organ, 
your first smile, 
 you giggling,
 your weak immune system, 
crawling, cruising and trying to walk,
 falling, hitting your head and having your first nose bleed.
and now....
I sit, I watch, I listen, I wait, and I pray. 
I pray you better. 
I pray that you are not sick with what I fear it is. 
I am filled with worry watching you struggle, 
and I I hope that you find comfort in my arms. 

Each month was a new adventure. I feel so blessed to have had this crazy whirl wind of a year. 

No comments:

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...